Dear Poker Counselor,
I have a hard time staying focused while playing because of the behavior of the other guys at the table. Whether I'm playing at my local casino or online, I seem to end up at the table with idiots who make rude comments and curse at me. When I run hot, they look down on me like I'm a lucky "fish." When I lose, it is even worse. I try to not let them get to me, but they always somehow get me off of my game. What can I do?

-Matt Hart, Connecticut

Dear Matt,

According to my mentor, Mike Caro, tells and psychology combine to account for most of your profit at the poker table. It's necessary to understand poker basics before concentrating on tells. When you first begin, you're too busy keeping up with the game and understanding everything going on. You may find it difficult at first to carefully scrutinize your opponents for tells. When you're ready to try, watch only one player at a time.

I come to in the back of an ambulance, tied down to a stretcher. A paramedic, his back turned, is filling a hypodermic needle. I ask, "Am I going to live?"

The Ugly Man, holding the needle, turns around and says, "No. You're going to die!" I struggle with my restraints. The Ugly Man, holding the needle, says, "You have to the count of three to give me your invitation to the House of Cards. One." He raises the needle.

"I can't give you. . . ." "Two." up over his head ". . . . what I don't have." "Three." and plunges it downwards.

Jeffrey Trauman has made history. As best I can tell, he is the first, and only, person who has actually been charged and convicted of online gambling. From the email Jeff sent me, I know that all he wanted was to be left alone.