Nothing stays the same, except some poker players. You can always tell a poker player; but, you can't tell some of them very much. You can go back in six months to your favorite brick and mortar poker room or online room and find some players that are playing the same way and still losing. The new rise of fresh players and the arrival of softer games are things that successful players watch and adapt to. Where a loose approach in late position worked several years ago, today you can find yourself called and outrun by looser players. Players who refuse to change their styles and strategies to fit the table, and the players seated before and after them will end up doing more whining and get a fresh supply of "bad beat" stories. Such players are probably just looking for such stories. With the recent changes, there's just more opportunity than ever before.
There's a common denominator for such inadaptable players. All of them are looking for solutions outside of themselves. After years of doing marital counseling, this common denominator applies to many people experiencing stress in their relationships. They are quick to blame their spouse for any problems. My favorite reply is to tell each spouse that, "You can't change someone else. You will lose and become impotent. However, if you focus on changing yourself, you can succeed and regain your personal potency."
Then we set out to make treatment goals of what each partner needs to change to improve their marriage. The same is true of poker players. Most of them look at conditions and people outside of themselves. They remain powerless to change because they blame weak players, bad dealers, bad luck, or some other excuse for their own mistakes. All of these "causes" are outside of their control. Yet, they will continue to loosely play poor starting hands and seem never to consider the odds of their chases.
I discovered this about my own silent whines. I say "silent" because it's not my way to whine out loud-it gives other players an edge. When I did poorly, I would look at how bad the run of cards were or how weaker players were lucky and won the pot. So, I took my own advice (which might be unusual for a psychologist/writer) and began to look at myself. I have been a very successful clinical psychologist and my practice flourished before I semi-retired. Much to my surprise, I discovered that the qualities which make for success as a counselor were a detriment in poker. My skills were having a positive relationship with others. This very ability prevented me from being as ruthless as I needed to be at the poker table. My empathy prevented me from putting a player all-in who was down in his luck-even when I was sure that I had him beaten. My ethics got in my way too. I'm sure that whenever I was bluffing it showed, and I wasn't aware of it. That's because as a professional counselor, truthfulness is stressed. In poker, being truthful becomes more of a liability.
Well, I'm better now and I hope I'm over that. I no longer play poker the way I do professional counseling. Don't get me wrong. As a psychologist I still have the reputation of being "warm and ruthless" when I do interventions and point out inconsistencies about which patients need to be confronted. It's just that when I play poker now, I have learned to be "warm and ruthless" when I check/raise or go all-in with the nuts.
So, the bottom line to success and to survive all the changes that occur in the game of poker is the ability to find out what your contribution to failure is. You can continue to look outside of yourself or you can look at yourself. Things outside of you are not in your power to change. You can, however, succeed in changing yourself-that is, if it's possible to improve an already perfect player.
