I can state with certainty that I know I am a winning poker player because I have kept meticulously accurate records for over ten years. The key word in the last sentence is poker. I'm not trying to confuse you, dear reader, but my problem is not poker. It's the fact that the online poker site that I spend most of my online time at offers alternative gaming options. Alternative gaming options is a very nice way to say, they give you a chance to piss your poker profits away at negative expectation games. Hey, so far nobody has put a gun to my head and forced me to play these other games. Hell, they don't need to because with disturbing regularity I find myself playing a little Black Jack after a poker session to, you know, just round up my bankroll. Round up, did I say? Round down is more accurate. Does this problem resonate with you at all? I hope not and if not, I vow to become as strong as you. So then, my online down fall is losing my poker profits at Black Jack. What is worse than that? Losing in a poker session and then compounding the loss by some out of control, desperate attempt to win the poker loss back with Black Jack and just digging a deeper hole.
Have you ever heard of The Martingale System? It is a flawed gambling system which became popular in 18th century France and necessitates an unlimited bankroll and no cap on how high you can bet. If you have both these criteria then how can you lose? You can just keep doubling the last loss to finally break even or show a profit. Here is the bad news........I don't have an unlimited bankroll and even if I did, they put a cap on how large a bet you can make at the Black Jack table in question. The further bad news is that without even approaching the world record for consecutive losing hands of Black Jack you can still lose a couple of coins of the realm.
Here is an example of the system in action. Imagine starting with a five dollar bet and losing. No problem, just bet another five dollars. If you lose that bet, bet ten dollars and if you lose that bet all you need to do is bet twenty. It's so easy, all you need to do is win your next bet and you'll have all your money back. However, so far you've only played four hands and if you lost them all you would be down $40. Here is the frightening part of this exquisite plan they call The Martingale, lose just four more hands and you will be stuck $640. Trust me, even though I have no idea what the record for the number of losing hands in a row actually is, I feel certain it is much higher than eight. Now let's assume the next bet of $640 doesn't faze you in your attempt to win back your losses, but you just exceeded the house limit of a maximum bet of $500. Now you need multiple wins to get your money back. The other fun aspect of this wretched behavior is that this phenomenon takes but a few minutes, while the $300 win you just booked in your poker session took over two hours. What's wrong with this picture?
I've made this public confession as a catharsis, so you know what my goal for this session will be. That's right, I'm done throwing away poker profit on negative expectation games. What should your goal for this time together be? If the shoe fits, wear it. If not, congratulations you're smarter and more disciplined than I but I'll be striving to catch up.
See you next "TIME".
