A song says, "...know when to hold 'em and know when to fold 'em." It should also include, "...know when not to play at all." It's true that a good player will have brains, know when to take risks, and be patient. However, very few have all three qualities at a regular pace, and even good players must ask themselves if it's a good time to be playing their favorite game. Oh, by the way, is Texas hold 'em your favorite game of poker? Or, would you rather play 7-card stud; but, the casino doesn't offer it?

There are times regardless of the game of poker you are playing that you should get up and leave or not sit down in the first place. Here are some:

When you are depressed and are playing to raise your spirits.

That's the worst time to play poker, which is far from an anti-depressant. Poker as a "game of failure," can depress you even more. That's because most hands are garbage. After all, a good batter in baseball gets a hit only three times out of ten. Would you play baseball to get out of a depression? For that matter, playing and drinking alcohol to the excess will depress you. The excess for some is one or two drinks.

Playing when you can't afford it. A lot of players will play with what I call "stolen money." They are not paying the rent or stealing the stake from money intended for daily expenses. This puts you in a desperate mood and results in your chasing your luck. You're not likely to be playing with much skill or being aggressive when you should be. This includes playing above you "pocket level" with money you can't afford to lose.

Playing when you are not having a good time. Not enjoying a table may mean that all the other players are moody and seem to be having a horrible time, or they are not there to have fun and are too serious. It's time to find another table. Perhaps all of your opponents are chasing their losses and such down moods will eventually rub off on you. When you start not having fun, and poker becomes more a chore than recreation, move on!

Playing when you are upset. If you are playing at a table where one or two people are on "tilt," this can help your game because they are probably not focused and are making mistakes. That's why it's good practice to get up and take a walk when you are upset or angry at another player or the way a play transpired. Don't play when you are not near your best state of mind. That's the reason to avoid playing when most of the players are on tilt. Why? Remember your odds go down when you are not enjoying yourself at the table. Such loose play often results in "suck-outs" and incredible luck against you.

Finally, never play when you are in a slump. You may not understand the reasons you are continually losing. It may be your mood, or because you are not having much fun. You may be playing for higher stakes than you should, or you're just playing lousy poker. Whatever the reason, it's time to avoid playing at all. Random shuffle yourself. Take a break and find some other form of entertainment.

I personally like to play Blackjack-that's my break when I am in a poker slump. Or, if it is warm out, I cut the grass instead. If it's not warm, shovel some snow or dance in the rain; just don't play poker-unless you enjoy losing.

The qualities of having brains, being courageous, and being patient enough to be a good player include 1) being smart about when to play at all, 2) being courageous to admit it's not a good time in your life to play, and 3) patiently waiting until the conditions are right for playing a good game of poker.

Jim McKenna has been practicing psychotherapy for more than thirty-five years. His books include the acclaimed Beyond Tells: Power Poker Psychology, Beyond Bluffs: Master the Mysteries of Poker, and Beyond Traps: The Anatomy of Poker Success, all published by Kensington Press. Write to Jim@Jimmckenna-PhD.com.