Here it is almost Christmas - or maybe it has already passed, depending on the newspaper calendar - and Santa Clause and the reindeer are already in the deliver mode. Not to be out-done The Rose Bowl parade boat fixers are finalizing the finishing touches on the New Year's Day floats. In addition, The Grinch - who attempts to steal Christmas every year - is warming up his routine.
All this going on and still no one's been able to un-cover the one mystery that has befuddled the most ardent, prepared, sleuth there ever was. That is, up 'til now! There is a place far, far, far, from the maddening crowd, way past civilization, many miles away from the North Pole, where Santa Clause resides. I believe I have discovered the truest truth amongst mankind, as we know it. Yes, I have discovered that place where the most privileged people hobnob. This fraternity is so sacred even the mere mention of it requires me to type softly, for fear of being discovered. Without furtherado, I have discovered where "THEY" live and their training regimen!
Who is "THEY?" These are the people that know a little bit of something about everything that ever existed - if you believe the history books and such. Nevertheless, don't take my word for it just look around you. Here are just a few things to familiarize yourself with what I am referring to: THEY say, "a watched pot never boils". THEY say, "It's going to rain tonight".
THEY say, "You never miss your water until your well runs dry". THEY say, "This, and THEY say that, as a matter of fact THEY say something about everything under the sun. There is no age discrimination. Race, creed, or religion doesn't even matter, THEY will still comment on it.
Example: 4-year old kid comes home from preschool.
"Mama, THEY say, that I have to bring a gift for our Christmas party".
Example 2: THEY say that, "overweight people..."
Example 3: THEY say that, "listening to loud music will cause you to go deaf".
Example 4: THEY say that, "big feet on a man means..."
But don't get this all twisted, THEY say many significant things as well. Example: THEY say, that, "9 out 10 people surveyed, use Zest!"
Example: THEY say, "... you can't win it, if you ain't in it!"
In regards to teens, THEY had this to say: "You can't get pregnant on the first time." That's for all you (babies mama's) out there who believed it. Well, like I was saying before, THEY have to have all this extensive training - both physical and emotional aptitude - in order to carry out this arduous task of informing the non-informed on every subject matter known to man 24 hours-aday 7 days a week! Yeah, I know who THEY are and where THEY reside? Well, here it goes I am finally going to reveal the culprits and how THEY operate, who's in charge, and their whereabouts. Ah, ah, I've just been informed, THEY said, "to turn off the computer if I know what's good for me...
